Mike Cameron*

What do Mike Cameron and Shawne Merriman* have in common?
Well, in addition to the fact that neither has ever done anything significant in the postseason, we now learn that Mike Cameron* also is a cheater.

The Minor-League Town Stat o' the Day

Number of times the words "Return to Normalcy" were uttered in relation to Sunday's Charger game being played at Qualcomm Stadium, less than a week after the wildfires:

672

Breaking News Alert: Firestorm 2007!

With 24/7 news coverage of this week's wildfires, everything that can be said has pretty much already been said.
Yet, a couple of snippets from the past week stick out in our mind:

• We didn't see this, but a pretty good source tells us that on Friday's "NFL Live" on ESPN, analyst Darren Woodson predicted that the Chargers would be "on fire" for Sunday's game against the Houston Texans. Tremendous.
• We couldn't help but notice that when Jim Rome was discussing the wildfires in San Diego this week on his ESPN program, "Jim Rome is Burning," the show's animated flame graphics were on the screen in the background. Uh, what's that? Only three people watch "Jim Rome is Burning"? Oh, never mind.
  

Best Link Ever (Non-Porn Division)

Despite last week's win, many Charger fans still would love to get rid of Norv Turner.
Well, somebody's doing something about it.

Getting It Almost Right The First Time

You gotta love ESPNEWS.
For a time Thursday morning, the network's BREAKING NEWS ticker said: "Reports: Schuerholz stepping down as Braves GM."
Then, less than an hour later, in that same space were the words: "Braves promote GM Schuerholz to Prez."
Uh, OK.
We love TV news, which reminds us ... Buckwheat has been shot!

Where Can We Find Towels?

The Raiders and their fans come to town this week, which means local law enforcement officers can expect a spike in overtime pay.
But we've never bought into the stereotype of all Raiders fans being thugs.
The way we see it, the Raider fan persona is all just an act. Just a little role play.
On Sundays, Raider fan plays dress up and engages in some male bonding with other like-minded souls.
On Mondays, Raider fan can be found working the register at Bed, Bath & Beyond.
Some Charger fans are intimidated by Raider fan, some Charger fans try to heckle Raider fan, while other Charger fans refuse to make eye contact with Raider fan.
But if Charger fan really wanted to get under Raider fan's skin, all he has to say is, "Price check on 500 thread count taupe linens on aisle 6."

A Kool Addition To The Roster

USD's basketball program is suddenly getting some national attention, which is odd in itself.
But the reason for the publicity is even more unusual.
A Toreros freshman forward by the name of Rob Jones is the grandson of infamous cult leader Jim Jones, who orchestrated the 1978 mass suicide in Guyana.
Rob Jones was recruited by former USD coach Brad Holland, which doesn't surprise us. Bradley always knew how to work, er, manipulate the media. And having a guy like Rob Jones on your roster guarantees some additional media attention for your program. A media savvy guy like Brad Holland surely knew that having the grandson of the People's Temple cult leader on your team was good for some feature stories in media outlets wherever the team plays.
But we've got to wonder what kind of things this guy is going to hear from crowds at places like Gonzaga. Sure, he's heard all the Kool-Aid jokes, no doubt. And will his teammates think twice before taking a sip of the Gatorade on the bench?
If this guy turns out to be a good player for USD, Brad Holland will have to get credit for recruiting him, and we commend Bradley for his unique approach to getting more pub for his now-former program.
But what's next?
Perhaps Steve Fisher can recruit a kid who's a relative of Heaven's Gate leader Marshall Herff Applewhite.

San Diego: Loserville, USA

Trevor Hoffman has saved a lot of games over the years -- yes, more than anyone in big-league history -- but one thing jumps out at you when you look over his career.
Whenever he's on the national stage, he pitches like crap.
We're too exhausted to look up all the numbers, but when Hoffman pitches in any playoff game, World Series game, All-Star Game -- any time the whole nation is watching -- the guy can't get anybody out.
Now, you can add a one-game Wild Card Playoff disaster to Hoffman's horrific resume on the national stage.
We'll spare you the gory play-by-play details, but Trevor was handed a two-run cushion -- thanks to Scott Hairston's two-run homer -- and Hoffman still couldn't get the job done as the Colorado Rockies outlasted the Padres 9-8 in 13 innings Monday night at Coors Field in Denver.
And we can't let Jake Peavy off the hook. Padres fans -- and sports radio dorks -- want you to believe Peavy should be the Cy Young Award winner. Jake the Fake looked very ordinary on this night. A true Cy Young winner would have taken the ball and pitched the game of his life in this situation.
It's been a rough couple of weeks for San Diego sports fans. The Chargers look totally lost and their head coach has all the passion and fire of a guy who looks like he needs a nap.
And now the Padres choke away the NL wild card, after being one strike away from clinching Saturday in Milwaukee -- thanks for that, Tony Gwynn Jr.
Say this much about the Padres, though. At least they played with some emotion and fire, unlike a certain football team. On Monday in Denver, these guys were playing like there's no tomorrow ... and now, there isn't.