But the Weather Was Nice

The Padres were hoping to make a splash on the national stage Tuesday.
Game 1 of their National League Division Series against the St. Louis Cardinals marked a rare opportunity for San Diego to play in front of a national television audience. Since the Padres play most of their games at 10 p.m. Eastern time, this was the first chance for many baseball fans across the country to really get a good look at the Padres.
And you always want to make a good first impression.
Well ... like a job applicant with a giant zit on his forehead, the Padres made a helluva first impression.
Put it this way: If this were college football and the team had a bunch of potential recruits in town for a visit, well, you'd have nothing to talk about right now but the weather.
The Padres could do nothing right in losing 5-1 to the Cardinals, and to put the loss in context a little more, it was the franchise's eighth consecutive defeat in posteason play, dating back to the 1998 World Series. Stuff like that has to start creeping into the heads of the players.
And speaking of head cases, how about Jake Peavy's sparkling performance?
What can we say of Jake the Fake? Well, let's let ESPN's fine duo of Chris Berman and Orel Hershiser take over. Early in the broadcast, Berman and Hershiser told viewers to disregard Peavy's 11-14 record, and they reminded us that Peavy is the ace of the Padres' staff.
Well, thanks for the advice, guys, but we'll take that 11-14 record into account all we want. And, really, the alleged ace of the staff pitched exactly like you'd expect a guy with an 11-14 record to pitch -- like crap.
And Peavy couldn't even benefit from some very generous calls from plate umpire Gerry Davis, who seemed to be giving Jake the Fake every pitch within two feet of the plate.
The ESPN guys also talked about how amped up Peavy was for the game. We know Peavy is an intense guy, but sometimes his demeanor can be downright odd. When Peavy's on the mound, the guy talks to himself more than Dustin Hoffman in "Rain Man."
But we can't just single out Jake the Fake. The Padres' offense got completely shut down -- again -- like so many other Padres performances all season. The stat of the day: Padres batters not named Dave Roberts went 3-for-27 Tuesday.
And has a playoff team ever had a more nondescript left side of the infield than Russell Branyan and Geoff Blum?
All in all, it was a thoroughly forgettable game.
But look on the bright side, Padres fans. At least the bullpen didn't give up four consecutive home runs.