Would You Like More Dessert, Ms. O'Donnell?

We've been ignoring it for too long, but it's time to point out the humongous: Chris Young has a rear end the size of South Dakota.
There, we said it.
Somebody had to.
The Padres right-hander clearly is not in as good a shape as he was last season, and just maybe his added poundage was a factor in his nightmare of a two-inning-plus outing Sunday night in the Padres' 9-3 loss to the Dodgers as ESPN's Sunday Night Baseball celebrated Jackie Robinson Day.
Young allowed five runs -- all earned -- on seven hits, five walks in an 84-pitch debacle. His two-inning night was Young's shortest stint since becoming a Padre.
During Charger season, we had some fun referring to Antonio Gates as "Oprah" because of his big behind, so it's only fair we do likewise with Chris Young.
From here on out, Chris Young is now Rosie O'Donnell, as far as we're concerned.
On Sunday night against the Dodgers, Rosie was laboring from the start and looked gassed before the first inning was over. The second inning was no better, and the big right-hander couldn't record an out in the third inning.
And all the while, Rosie was having a ridiculously hard time holding runners on base. Thanks to Rosie's high leg kick (now there's an image you won't be able to get out of your mind) and halting, hesitating delivery to the plate, the Dodgers had five stolen bases Sunday -- the most they've had in eight years.
Way to go, Ro.